Only When I Laugh

A rather naive, middle-class man is admitted to a hospital ward and finds that he is sharing it with a working-class layabout and an upper-class hypochondriac. All three of them cause headaches for the hospital staff.

Genre: Comedy

Cast:James Bolam , Peter Bowles , Christopher Strauli , Richard Wilson , Derrick Branche , Alexandra Brook , Wanda Ventham , Neil McCarthy , Frank Middlemass , Diane Bull , Nicholas McArdle , Terry Diab , Stephen Greif , John Junkin , Robert Gillespie , Patsy Smart , Sally Osborne , Patrick Troughton

1Season 1

S1.E1 ∙ A Bed with a View

Mon, Oct 29, 1979

Young Norman Binns is admitted to Dr Thorpe's hospital ward and is tricked by pessimistic patient Figgis into swapping beds with him so that Figgis can have the bed with the window view. As a result the doctor and staff nurse Gupte confuse the two men's symptoms. Then hypochondriac Glover tells Figgis that the last occupant of the bed has 'gone to a better place', scaring him into giving it back to Norman, though Glover's claim that he is dying means that Norman loses the bed again.

2Season 1

S1.E2 ∙ Operation Norman

Mon, Nov 5, 1979

Norman has to have an operation for his appendix to be removed but Figgis's doom-laden description of operations and Dr Thorpe's tiredness do not give him confidence and he hides in the toilet, having to be coaxed out. Gupte uses a hypodermic syringe to knock him out but accidentally injects Glover so that the only way Norman will be persuaded to have the operation is if he is accompanied by Figgis - who, to Dr Thorpe's glee, hates the sight of blood.

3Season 1

S1.E3 ∙ The Rumour

Mon, Nov 12, 1979

Dr Thorpe is telling Gupte that his dog Victor is not well but Gupte misunderstands and thinks he is talking about his son. The patients also fall prey to the misunderstanding, for various reasons each of them believing that they are going to die. Dr Thorpe manages to tell Figgis and Norman the truth but by this time Glover has rung up his boss to tell him exactly what he thinks of him.

4Season 1

S1.E4 ∙ The Man with the Face

Mon, Nov 19, 1979

Glover has been seeing a Greek girl Anna and panics when her violent boyfriend Nico comes looking for him so Figgis wraps his head in bandages and says he is a burns victim. Aware that Nico will want to see him with the bandages removed Figgis then swathes Norman in bandages so that he can be the one to face Nico - and for good measure covers his own head up, causing Dr Thorpe no end of confusion.

5Season 1

S1.E5 ∙ Let Them Eat Cake

Mon, Nov 26, 1979

The patients find the hospital food disgusting and decide to go on hunger strike but soon weaken. However Clegg, who serves the food then decides to go on strike himself, but has his foot run over by Dr Thorpe whilst on the picket line outside the hospital. Eventually he is persuaded to go back to work and the patients can eat again - only to be confronted by the irate cook demanding to know who is criticizing her food.

6Season 1

S1.E6 ∙ Tangled Web

Mon, Dec 3, 1979

Norman is reading 'Tangled Web', a hospital romance, when he sees new nurse Sally, who is exactly like the book's heroine. He is keen to express his feelings for her but finds he has rivals in Glover, Dr Thorpe and Gupte, who are all keen to pursue. Eventually Figgis sets Thorpe and Gupte against each other and gets rid of Glover but even Norman is surprised by his idol's passionate response.

7Season 1

S1.E7 ∙ Is There a Doctor in the House?

Mon, Dec 10, 1979

Glover is discharged and Figgis is unhappy as he has nobody with whom to argue so he goes to the local pub pretending to be a doctor and diagnosing people with terrible illnesses, filling the ward. When Dr Thorpe finds out he goes after Figgis, giving Gupte instructions to hit him but when Gupte sees Thorpe examining a patient he assumes it is Figgis in his doctor's guise and hits him instead. As a result the doctor ends up as a patient with Norman, Figgis - and Glover, who has been readmitted as not well enough to go home.

1Season 2

S2.E1 ∙ Whatever Happened to Gloria Robins?

Tue, Apr 29, 1980

Glover is thrilled when Gloria Robins, the beautiful film star, is admitted to a woman's ward and is soon romancing her with flowers. Characteristically Figgis is cynical but even he falls under Gloria's spell - as do Norman and Dr Thorpe. When Gloria is discharged she delivers an emotional farewell to Glover, which touches his heart - until he hears it again in one of her old films on the TV that evening.

2Season 2

S2.E2 ∙ Where There's a Will

Tue, May 6, 1980

Glover does not take kindly to eccentric new patient Joe Perkins - with his invisible dog - due to his lack of hygiene and use of Glover's drinking tumbler for his false teeth. However when he discovers that Joe's tin box contains a fortune and the man is considering changing his will Glover - and Norman - both fawn on him to get into his good books. In the event the heir turns out to be Figgis, who is uncharacteristically noble in refusing the legacy and preventing Joe from being sectioned.

3Season 2

S2.E3 ∙ It Can Damage Your Health

Tue, May 13, 1980

Norman has recently taken up smoking but long term smokers Glover and Figgis are feeling the ill effects of the habit and try, respectively, a pipe and yoga to help quit - but in vain. Glover goes for a job interview but, off the cigarettes, he is a bag of nerves and fails. Figgis carries on secretly smoking behind the others' backs, leading to Dr Thorpe getting a nasty surprise in the gents' toilets.

4Season 2

S2.E4 ∙ The Cosmic Influence

Tue, May 20, 1980

When Figgis becomes obsessed with horoscopes in magazines and believes their predictions the others are sceptical - until Norman continually beats Glover at cards. However, Figgis becomes so preoccupied with astrological predictions he is convinced he is going to die - forcing Dr Thorpe to beat him at his own game to cure him of his obsession - though Glover's change of luck at cards also plays a part.

5Season 2

S2.E5 ∙ The Visitors

Tue, May 27, 1980

Norman's overbearing, hypochondriac mother comes to visit and he is initially scared to tell her he is romancing nurse Jenny. Norman's cowardice gives Glover the opportunity to try and make a move but Figgis puts him off with lies about Jenny and the young couple eventually stand up to Mrs Binns. Figgis meanwhile shares a passionate embrace with a visitor who is not his wife - and is also unaware that he has one. Thanks to a misplaced gesture by Norman, though, she will shortly come face to face with her.

6Season 2

S2.E6 ∙ The Lost Sheep

Tue, Jun 3, 1980

When the hospital vicar comes to discuss Norman's wedding agnostic Figgis gets into a religious argument but ultimately fears for his soul because he has not been christened and so he agrees to go ahead with the ceremony. This turns him into a zealous religious missionary - until he hears a confession from Glover, which drastically alters his charitable outlook.

7Season 2

S2.E7 ∙ Last Tango

Tue, Jun 10, 1980

Feeling wistful that they were unable to attend the staff dance with its majority of females, the patients decide to make their own alcohol and have a party of their own, inviting Nurse Eileen. Needless to say Figgis and Glover - and Dr Thorpe - vie with each other to impress her with their dance moves whilst Norman merely gets drunk and the whole thing is ended with the arrival of Matron, who has escaped from Gupte's passionate declarations.

1Season 3

S3.E1 ∙ A Day in the Life Of

Wed, Sep 2, 1981

A documentary television crew come to the hospital to shadow Dr Thorpe for a day. He has primed Norman to give him a glowing report but Norman keeps fluffing his lines so Glover is only too keen to take over. However he plays to the gallery so outrageously that finally Figgis speaks to camera - using the opportunity to criticize everything about the hospital and leading to a shut-down.

2Season 3

S3.E2 ∙ The Right Honourable Gentleman

Wed, Sep 9, 1981

Extreme right wing politician Sir Julian Briggs is admitted to the ward, angering socialist Figgis though Dr Thorpe is anxious to get him on side as the hospital is facing closure. Unfortunately Sir Julian is not sympathetic. However after he has received a death threat and a parcel, erroneously believed to be a bomb, is delivered, Dr Thorpe is able to capitalize on Sir Julian's cowardly response to pressure him into opposing the closure.

3Season 3

S3.E3 ∙ Adam's Rib

Wed, Sep 16, 1981

When new doctor Amy Glossop starts on the ward, Dr Thorpe is initially hostile because she is a woman, though both Glover and Norman have soon fallen in love with her. Figgis decides to warn her of their amorous intentions in a somewhat cryptic manner so that when Dr Thorpe comes to offer an apology she wrongly believes that he is her secret admirer. Figgis himself, however, shows that he too is not immune to her charms.

4Season 3

S3.E4 ∙ Postman's Knock

Wed, Sep 23, 1981

Believing that Glover is lonely Figgis writes an anonymous letter in character as Glover to agony aunt Clare Butterfield, who is annoyed by the writer's arrogance. However Glover has answered a want ad and is expecting a visit from free-thinking Leonora. Much confusion arises when Glover mistakes occupational therapist Mrs Roper-Jones for Leonora and is later visited by Ms. Butterfield herself. Figgis accidentally ends up having a wild time with Leonora but Glover is about to write another letter to the agony aunt to exact revenge.

5Season 3

S3.E5 ∙ Accident

Wed, Sep 30, 1981

Norman witnesses an accident outside the hospital gates involving Dr Thorpe and young speed freak Ronnie though it is the doctor who would appear to be in the wrong when his breath sample taken by the attendant traffic cop proves positive for alcohol. Figgis and Glover stage a mock court trial to get Norman to divulge the truth though it is Gupta who actually sets the record straight, before Norman sees another accident - this time caused by the policeman.

6Season 3

S3.E6 ∙ Dear Diary

Wed, Oct 7, 1981

Norman has been keeping a diary and Figgis and Glover are anxious to see what he has written about them. On stealing the diary from him they find that most of the entries are fantasies in which Norman is the brave patient soothing everybody else's nerves, as well as inventing a romance between himself and the notoriously icy Nurse Bradley. However when Nurse Bradley also reads the diary Norman is in for a pleasant surprise.

7Season 3

S3.E7 ∙ These You Have Loved

Wed, Oct 14, 1981

Figgis takes exception to the anodyne hospital radio run by nurse Victoria Plumtree and, when she accidentally leaves her recording equipment in the ward, spices things up by taping and broadcasting one of Dr Thorpe's tirades. Having persuaded Victoria to allow him to record his own show he gets Glover and Norman to roam the hospital in search of stories - and gets one when they accidentally stumble upon Victoria's passionate meeting with Dr Thorpe and allow the whole hospital to hear their emotional outpourings.

8Season 3

S3.E8 ∙ Away for Christmas

Thu, Dec 24, 1981

On Christmas Eve the ward gets a new patient, eight year old elected mute Danny, whose parents are abroad and is a known arsonist. Figgis dresses up as Santa Claus to steal presents for him from the children's ward but is rumbled and has to escape, getting the benefits of kisses from nurses who mistake him for the hospital's other Santa, Dr Thorpe. Eventually Dr Thorpe brings Danny some Christmas cheer and accidentally gets him talking again.

1Season 4

S4.E1 ∙ Blood Brothers

Thu, Nov 4, 1982

Dr Thorpe believes that Glover needs a blood transfusion and Figgis is the same blood group but Glover, being a snob, is not happy to be the recipient, especially when he hears that Figgis has received a transfusion himself from a West Indian. In the event it turns out to be Figgis who needs the transfusion and Glover who is the donor, as a result of which Figgis begins to act in an unusually upper class manner.

2Season 4

S4.E2 ∙ Conduct Unbecoming

Thu, Nov 11, 1982

Dr Thorpe becomes an unlikely sex object when nymphomaniac patient Fiona demands they run off together and has written a complaint letter to the hospital board, whose chairman is her father, unless he agrees to her demand. The patients adopt various disguises in order to try and retrieve the letter from Fiona's room but ultimately it is Glover, in his persona as a suave specialist, that causes Fiona to switch her affections and save Thorpe's job.

3Season 4

S4.E3 ∙ All in the Mind

Thu, Nov 18, 1982

Having got a book on psychology from the library Figgis takes it upon himself to analyze his fellow patients, alleging that Glover has a persecution complex and Norman is sexually repressed. After a disastrous group therapy session and an unsuccessful attempt to cure Norman's fear of cats it is Figgis who ends up having to see a psychiatrist - though she is young and pretty.

4Season 4

S4.E4 ∙ In Sickness & in Health

Thu, Nov 25, 1982

Norman is to marry the dull and plain Deirdre, rather than Jenny, and is most reluctant. Glover decides to flatter Deirdre in order that she might blossom but rather overdoes it so that she transforms into a glamorous, confident woman with no need for Norman. Dr Thorpe brings his marriage guidance counsellor wife in to speak to Deirdre but, having heard her speak glowingly of her encounter with an older man, gets the wrong idea.

5Season 4

S4.E5 ∙ Escape

Thu, Dec 2, 1982

Glover is charmed by new admission Harry Bridgewater - until it transpires that he is a prisoner who has come in for an operation with a guard in attendance. Having tried to pass himself off as a hardened criminal Bridgewater has to admit he is but a getaway driver but asks the patients to cover for him whilst he escapes - for a night - to have sex with his wife. They agree and persuade Dr Thorpe to assist them but will the convict return next day?

6Season 4

S4.E6 ∙ When Did You Last See Your Father?

Thu, Dec 9, 1982

Charlie, an elderly drunk, arrives at the hospital, claiming that he is looking for his son, from whom he has long been estranged. The assumption is that his son is Norman though it turns out to be Glover, who, after initial disgust, starts to warm to the old boy, especially when Charlie promises to lay off the booze. In fact he gets so emotional that Charlie has to resort to playing at being drunk just to get rid of him.

7Season 4

S4.E7 ∙ The Reunion

Thu, Dec 16, 1982

The patients are discharged on the same day - somewhat reluctantly given their lengths of stay - and decide to have a reunion the same evening in a restaurant. By chance Dr Thorpe is there with Hilary, who is emphatically not his wife, and when Thorpe goes to make a phone call, Glover, seeing her alone, moves in and succeeds in going home with her. Figgis cannot stop himself from presenting the doctor with his latest list of ailments, causing Thorpe to flee. However next morning he gets an unpleasant surprise - Figgis is back on the ward having fallen downstairs and broken his leg.